“I came to the Dark Temple as someone lost. I was new to the kink community and didn’t know where to look. I took a online Tantra class from Dark Temple and was drawn to the authenticity and energy of Mistress Lucia.
I went to a Red Tent event and found my voice through introspection and community with other women. They helped me speak my truth out loud. I was beginning to find myself through reflection and a meditation with my spirit.
Then I walked into the Tantalize event and knew I had finally stepped into a safe space to be who I am. The atmosphere was welcoming and respectful. I made some new friends; watched some interesting techniques; and became inspired to communicate my wants and express my desires.
I’ve found authenticity in my life through the open communication and consensual discourse I’ve experienced at different events in Dark Temple. They helped me find my voice and open up to my husband about my true kinky, tantric self. We were able to communicate our desires and needs in an honest and respectful way. Now our marriage is stronger than ever and I finally feel like a whole version of myself.”
Liz S., Sarasota, FL.
"Thank you so much for the Temples Orientation. It was so refreshing to know that there are people out there who understand the mental complexity of BDSM which in my day was called S&M.
From my experience those concerns went by the wayside as it became more acceptable in the late 90’s. More people were getting into it without education & training.
I myself started in the early 80’s & went through months of rigorous training w a master learning to be a bottom 1st then moving on to a top. From there I went on as an apprentice with a seasoned Dominatrix before I worked as a Dom myself. I topped for money & bottomed for pleasure.
Safety (mental & physical) was always our 1st concern.
I, what they called then, would fly & was unable to communicate where I was verbally or physically.
It was of utmost importance for me (or anyone that would fly) to only be w a Dom that was trust worthy & knew me/them.
When u spoke about that space that some may travel to in a session, that was me.
I ended up retiring because of getting hurt mentally & physically even w all my training, due to childhood trauma being awakened.
I choose the wrong people to get involved with one night (I was told they could b trusted) needless to say they could not. I went completely against my intuition.
When you spoke of waking up with no follow up or after care, I related so well.
I felt abandoned, used & violated.
I wanted to kill myself. I remained in a ball rocking for several days alone w no contact from the outside world.
Luckily, somewhere in my conscious mind, I knew I needed help. I found the # in the back of the book S&M 101 to a hot line & was directed to a sex addition group. That was not the correct solution for me but it got me on my journey for the help I needed. To this day I am still fighting the trauma, I will take it to my grave. Awareness has helped me. It gets better because of people like you that want to help & share their knowledge & experiences. I am no longer a victim. My intention is to remain present as much as possible & catch myself if I don’t & not chastise myself for doing so.
Loving myself is becoming easier… It’s taken many years. I am 76 now & will continue on …..
I want to thank you so much for helping those who choose this path to understand it fully. The good & the bad. Respect & understanding is the key."
Anonymous, Sarasota, FL.
"Thank you for yesterday’s Dark Temple orientation. My wife and I have been discussing it a lot, and I wanted to share our feelings about how wonderful your approach is. We’ve been together for over twenty years, and although our kink works great now, it was a challenging road—for exactly the reasons you focused on. My wife is a trauma survivor, and, at the outset, I didn’t have the knowledge to be trauma-aware. This meant that we went through loops where her trauma would be unexpectedly triggered, with results that repeatedly drove us apart. In fact, the big breakthrough for us was when she discovered somatic therapy some years ago. Your orientation spoke perfectly to our experience.
This was so incredibly welcome because your approach is hard to find in the kink community, where it is often implied that trauma responses can only result from consent violations. We know that this is not true and that trauma can be triggered even by consensual, safe, loving experiences. Without downplaying the significance of consent violations, an education-focused exclusively on them leaves players without the tools to process and heal from problems arising in their absence.
Thank you for bringing a more mature and comprehensive understanding to the world of kink."